I lost my boyfriend in a car accident caused by a drunk driver
I am trying to deal with the death of my boyfriend and best friend. I am trying to wrap my head around the fact that I walked away from the accident with barely any injuries but my boyfriend died after being in the ICU for 8 days. My boyfriend meant the whole world to me. He was the one who was always there for me when I needed someone. We would not have been on the road still if it wasn’t for me wanting to go to the store. I feel so guilty because we would have been safely at home if I didn’t want to stop. He showed me so much love and support. Now I don’t want to do anything, I am tired all the time but I can’t sleep. If I do sleep, it’s only for a few hours. I don’t care about what I eat. I am indifferent to everything. I don’t find comfort anything I used to, reading, my family, nothing is making me feel better. I just want to sleep. I am only 22 years old and my boyfriend was only 24 with his whole life in front of him. He was getting himself together and everything was falling into place for him. I know how I am feeing isn’t healthy and I know he would hate for me to be this way when all he wanted for me was to be happy and smile. Because of the accident, I can’t even focus on school and I’m only a few weeks away from receiving my masters. I don’t know how to pull myself together without feeling like I’m going to fall apart. My family is taking care of me and making sure that I eat, even though I don’t care what it is. I live on my school’s campus but I’m not sure I will be able to take care of myself. I knew my boyfriend for 9 years but we were only dating again for 2 months. We were so happy and our future together was cut short when we thought we had years together. I don’t know how to deal with this. I don’t really cry much, when people constantly bother me, I get angry and yell at them, and other time, I just am apathetic.
